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“It’s okay. We’re here for you.”
This is what I wish my parents had said to me when I approached them to talk about wanting to go for therapy. The amount of courage it took for me to start this conversation with them was indescribable. I was terrified of being judged by my own parents. As if the fear of being judged by this world wasn’t enough for me already. My hands were shaking, my heart was racing and the only thing that was going on in my head was, “please support me, please understand me.”
When I realized I needed therapy, I was going through an anxiety disorder so severe, that I had almost fallen into depression. I used to tear up randomly, become breathless all of a sudden, my head would be spinning like crazy. I could not open up about this at home because it is a known fact that our society is not very accepting of the idea of going to a psychologist.
Why is going to a normal doctor such an easy thing to admit? Why is it so normal for us to be open about our physical illnesses but so difficult for us to be open about our mental illnesses? Is our brain not a part of our body too? Can it not be disturbed too?
Our brain controls our entire body. It controls the smallest to the biggest decisions that we make. It is our mind, our intellect, through which we are known. It is what we have been fed since our childhood, to be a “smart” kid and the most “intelligent” in class. To be able to do all of that, we need to be mentally stable. Yet, mental health is not given the importance it deserves.
Just like we have doctors which help us cure our physical wounds, we also have doctors which help us cure our emotional wounds. Research shows that a severe heartbreak can actually cause death, and emotional pain can have an impact on us which is just as strong as physical pain.
I couldn’t open up to my parents about what exactly had been bothering me, all I told them was, “I need to do this. Please. It is very important for me, it has started to have a negative impact on my life.” That didn’t convince them. They instantly got worried and started questioning me about what I was hiding. They would say I was being too “ungrateful” and made me feel guilty, because I have all of the facilities and all of my needs and wants are being fulfilled. I used to fall for it and think that maybe I actually WAS being ungrateful. But eventually, I realized that this is something I had lost control over. My mind was controlling me, and that was dangerous.
That is when I had to build up the courage to try and shatter the boundaries which the society had created for us. I am not a rebellious child, in fact I am the complete opposite. It scares me to the core when I do the simplest of things which I know would affect my family. This time, I had no choice. I had to put myself first.
It took a lot of patience and consistency for me to make my parents understand the importance of therapy, and they finally did. Or maybe they just got tired of saying “no” and eventually gave in. Whatever it was, I’m glad it happened. Because now, I am not afraid to face the world. I have nothing to be afraid of, if I have my family's support. That is the most important thing for us. That is what keeps us going.
Many, actually most of our parents, are not very accepting of this concept, still. I encourage all of you, to take a stand for yourself, for the sake of your mental as well as physical well-being. I encourage you all to start making an effort to bring the change that we need, and we have to start from our own homes. The next time, our parents ask us “Duniya kya kahegi?”, we simply need to tell them, “Aap hi duniya ho.”